Divorce, Khalea & Dehar

Shaikh Mohammed Bin Salih El-Otheimeen was asked the following question:

          The extent of the correctness of “the most detested of the lawful to Allah is divorce”

Answer:

          This Hadith is weak because even from phrasing point of view it is not right to say “the most detested of the lawful to Allah” because whatever is detested by Allah cannot be lawful and permitted, but no doubt that Allah does not like divorce, for example a man to divorce his wife, hterefore, divorce is a detested behaviour.  The evidence which confirms that Allah does not like the act of divorcing is the Quranic verse which says, “For those who take an oath for abstention from their wives, a waiting for four months is ordained.  If then they return Allah is often forgiving, most merciful.  But if their intention is firm from for divorce Allah hear and know all things” [2:226-227].  In case of they forgive each other and decide to remain united, Allah said, “Allah is often forgiving, most most merciful” it means that Allah will forgive them and bestow his mercy on them.  In case of their determination to get divorced, Allah said, “Allah hear and know all things” this means that Allah does not like them to get divorced.  We all know that divorce breaks the heart of the woman, breaks houses and family bond scatters children in the street and trouble the insulation of marriage.  Therefore Allah does not like it.

Shaikh Abdel Aziz Bin Baz was asked the following question:

          When the woman can be considered to be divorced? Why divorce was permitted by religion?

Answer:

          The woman is considered to be divorced if her husband tells her that she is divorced while he is sober and not under the effect of madness or drunkenness…etc and if the woman was pure a purity that is not affected by sexual intercourse or if she was a pregnant or a menopause.  But if the woman was at the time of divorce was, menstruating or in the period of childbed or if she was in a state of purity but sexually consumed by her husband and she was not pregnant and not menopause, the divorce is not applicable on her except through the ruling of a legal judge.  If the legal judge rules that divorce is valid then if she is to be treated as a divorced.  Because the ruling of a judge removes disagreement in jurist prudential matters.  If the husband was mad or under the influence of wine, drug…. etc or forced to utter the term of divorce as well as very angry to such extent that he could not give considerations to the harms of divorce and the  divorced believes him and took the matter seriously or the testimony of evidence which proofs that he was not sober, all these factors makes divorce invalid.  In this regard the prophet (PBUH) says, “the den (recording of behaviors) is raised from the infant till he grows-up (reaches puberty period) and the sleeping until he/she makes up and the mad until he/she becomes conscious” Allah the Exalted in might also says, “Any one who, after accepting faith in Allah, utters unbelievers under compulsion, His heart remaining firm in faith” [16:106].  Therefore, if some one is forced to be unbeliever, he is not considered to be unbeliever if his heart is remains firmly faithful faith believe.  Similarly, if somebody is forced to divorce under extraordinary circumstances, then the divorce is not valid.  The prophet Mohammed (PBUH) says, “No divorce and no disengagement by force” [Refer to Ahmed, Ibn Maha and corrected by El-Hakim] the term “disengagement” was interpreted to be excessive and extreme anger. Othman bin Allah (PBUH) decreed that there is no divorce in a state of drunkenness.  However, the rational behind permitting divorce is that the couple may feel that they are unsuitable for each other and they may hate each other.  Therefore in such an environment a normal news generation cannot be brought up therefore, Islam permitted the occurrence of divorce under extraordinary circumstances.

Shaikh Mohammed Bin Salih El-Otheimeen was asked the following question:

          I have divorced my wife three separate divorces.  The first one I was in the state of drunkenness anger and rage.  The other two divorces were the result of excessive anger.  However, love is still existing between us.  Is it possible to return to each other again?

Answer:

          Firstly he said that he divorced his wife three timely.  The first divorce was under the influence of wine and anger.  The second and the third divorces were under the influence of anger.  We ask him, did he consider them divorce or not?  Regarding the divorce, which is uttered by drunkenness, some scholars say that it is invalid due to the absence of intellect.  Some other scholars say that it is valid and they consider it valid so that to punish him (as a punishment for him).  However, majority of opinions supports the decree, which says it is invalid.  Because he was not sober and does not know what he is saying.  Regarding punishment is that he is to be punished by whipping in the first time.  If he return again, he is to be whipped again.  If he returns again he is to be whipped again.  If he returns again he is to be killed.  Because the prophet Mohammed (PBUH) says, “whoever drinks wine, whip him then if he drink kill him”.  He ordered to be killed in the fourth time.  However, scholars disagree whether this Hadith is abrogated or resjudicata some claim that it is abrogated and some others say that it is resjudicata.  Another group says that it is resjudicata but restricted.  However, the most right opinion is that it is resjudicata but restricted.  By what it is restricted?  It is restricted by whether people would be deterred without enforcing death penalty or not.  If a man does not get deterred by repeated whipping then he is to be killed in the fourth time.  This is the opinion of Ibn Taymeya.  Those who said that he is to be killed in the fourth time are Zahir group represented by Ibn Hazim and those who preceded and followed them.  Those who said that the Hadith is abrogated are the people of Ahl Al-Ilm.  But as we all know, in case of abrogation there are two conditions, 1. Impossibility to harmonize between the two laws. 2. Knowing the delay of the abrogate.  If it was possible to harmonize between them, then there is no abrogation.  In other words, whenever it becomes possible to harmonize between the decrees, then it is possible to speak of them together so that not to cancel some of them.  But if the date of the issuing or revealing the two decrees is not known it is better not to deal with them.  Because to abrogate any of them by the other is not better than forgiving.  He says that second divorce he says that he was under the effect of anger.  However, anger has three stages, initial, middle and end.  The initial is anger the easy and simple anger which man knows what he is saying and capable of controlling himself.  This type has no effect.  The middle anger or moderate anger is that which makes the angry cannot control himself, as if something forced him to utter the word divorce.  The third type that type of anger, which makes the angry loose control over what he is saying or whether he is on earth or flying in the space.  This type sometimes affects some people and hey become nervous and fail to control his intellect and tongue.  He fails to know that whether he is with his wife or in the market.  Scholars agree that the man in the third stage of anger must be considered as a man without sober intellect.  He is to be treated as a mad and consequently, divorce is invalid in such a case.  The evidence is that the prophet (PBUH) said, “No divorce in the state of anger” [refer to Ahmed, Ibn Maja] Because if this man is forced to divorce and then he divorces, the divorce in such a situation is invalid because it resulted from forcing and it is a forcing by an internal matter which must be revealed.

Shaikh Ibn Otheimeen was asked the following question:

          When I wanted to travel, my wife insisted to remain with her family and not with my family.  Her family is not keen about religious teachings.  Therefore, I told her if she stays with them she would no more remain my wife. She stayed with her family.  Is this considered to be thrice divorce?  What to do?

Answer:

          Before I answer this question, I would like to advice husbands not to make the term of divorce on the tip of their tongues.  This is a dangerous issue, marriage contract is given so much importance by Islam that there is no any other contract which found such a concern and importance from Islam.  Islam gave much and keen interest as well as careful and its procedures.  The put careful provisions to family and family life, because on the basis of that family, lineage hereditary …etc are decided.  Married life affect the whole society, unfortunately, some people utter the word of divorce without considering its disastrous effect on the wife, family and society as a whole.  Man hastily utter the team “divorce” and then regretfully search all ways which may rescue him found this disastrous mistake.  Therefore, my advice for people is that they should not take such crucial decisions carelessly.  However, the rational of Islam, behind prohibiting man from divorcing the woman during menstruation period.  Because in such a situation and he has prohibited himself from touching her, he may hate her.  Man also is prohibited from divorcing her during the period of purely.  Because she might have conceived from him during that time and he did not know it.  He may also feel unattached to her because he has just satisfied himself from her, therefore, he is in the state of sexual satisfaction at that moment and may take the decision of divorce carelessly.  Therefore, Islam wanted man to be careful about the decision of divorce, but if it happens and a man says to his wife that if she do so and so she is not his wife or she is divorced and such other frank or metaphorical terms of divorce, then we may ask him and he must answer us from the depth of his intention, because Allah will trial him, whether he meant divorce by uttering it or just he uttered it to threat his wife.  In other words, did he want to divorce her and enforce his threat if she disobeyed him?  Do you dislike her, or you wanted just to threat her if she does not obey you.  If it was a matter of threat only, then if she disobey you, she is not to be considered as a divorced.  But in such a case you must perform penance of oath.  Because it is an oath case.

The permanent committee of Decree was asked the following question:

          What the rule of religion regarding the single divorce which took place with a single utterance and for a specific time.  For example: A man says to his wife, you are divorced for one month.  Is this divorce valid? Is it a sin to do so?  What is the opinion of religion if he practices sexual intercourse with her before the period of one month is over?  It is worth mentioning that the wife did not leave the house of her husband during that period?

Answer:

          Yes, in this case divorce is valid and it is a single returnable divorce.  In other words, he can return her since she is still in the period of Iddah.  However, divorce cannot be for a specific period. For example, “you are divorced for one month” If the word of divorce uttered it can not be restricted to any period and it does not end by the end of that period.  But if divorce was less than “thrice or three times divorce” then the husband can returns her if she was still in the period of Iddah.

Shaikh Ibn Otheimeen was asked the following question:

           A man was absent and away from his wife for a long time and he has taken the decision of divorcing her but he did not inform her.  In such a situation is divorce valid or not?

Answer:

          Yes, divorce is valid even if he did not inform her.  If a man utters the term of divorce and say, “I divorced my wife” she becomes divorced if she knows or not.  Therefore, if we suppose that this wife did not know that she is divorced by her husband and undergoes three menstruation period )menstruated for three times) it means that she has already completed the Iddah period although she does not know that she is divorced.  This is the same case with a woman whose husband dies and she did not know until the supposed period of Iddah was over.  In such a case she is not required to do the period of Iddah when she comes to know about his death.

Shaikh Mohammed Bin Ibraheem was asked the following question:

          She claimed that her he is impotent and when he was asked to undergo medical check-up he escaped.  What is the opinion of religion in this regard?

Answer:

          The wife claimed that her husband is impotent and that she is still virgin.  The husband denied.  When the judge to transfer her for medical check-up by a midwife to confirm whether she is still virgin or not, and before the process is completed the husband escaped and did not return.  In this case the husband must be asked to terminate his claim with his wife and if he does not come, then the judge can consider him as a deserter and oblige him to spend on her.

Shaikh Mohammed Bin Ibraheem was asked the following question:

          In the wedding night he found her in virgin.  What should he do?

Answer:

          You are asked to see the legal court, moreover, it would be better not to speak about her un-Virginian if you are not sure.

Shaikh Abdel Aziz Bin Baz was asked the following question:

          What are the causes of divorce according to your opinion?

Answer:

          Many reasons are behind the occurrence of divorce such as the absence of love and harmony between the couple, bad nature and morality of the woman and vice versa, disobedience by the wife to hr husband.  If the husband does not do justice to her, inability of the husband to perform his duties towards his wife or vice versa committing of sin by any of them, addiction of wine, cigarette ..etc, by the husband and vice versa, bad relation between in-laws, it the woman does not take care of herself, beautifies herself to him, speak to him lovingly and mildly, receive him smilingly and fragrant herself to him..etc.